I’m here at the Vintage Fair, it happens every weekend In July.
I’m going to find something for my girlfriend. I’m going to meet the owner, organizer and he’s going to help me out. I’m here in front of Veggie Hotdogs, the bar owner is pretty cool, he doesn't eat meat, but they drink a lot so, it’s pretty, I dunno, it’s a good time.
Jordan: What's up dude?
Organizer: Hello, come on, I will take you to some very awesome...
Organizer: Yeah, very awesome girls, very beautiful girls.
Organizer: Hey Fala, are you busy now? I have a friend here who wants to find a gift.
Organizer: Can you speak English?
Seller 1: Not really.
Organizer: Don't worry. You can speak Chinese and they will be your translators.
Organizer: Look around, please.
Jordan: Can I get this for free?
Seller 1: No.
Seller 1: If this one is free, you must buy this one, it’s 300.
Jordan: Oh I see, so buy one get one free.
Seller 1: Yeah.
Jordan: OK. OK, I’ll come later, Thank you, I’ll come later.
Seller 1: OK, bye.
Organizer: He wants to find a gift for his girlfriend. You can speak English, don't you? Talk with him.
Seller 2: So what kind of stuff do you want?
Jordan: Ummm, I don’t know? I'm looking for something for my girlfriend.
Jordan: How much is this?
Seller 2: This bracelet is 50.
Jordan: Is that for free? Please?
Seller 2: You know it’s a gift for your girlfriend, if it’s free...
Jordan: Oh then it’s not a good gift?
Seller 2: It’s not a good gift.
Jordan: Oh, but it’s from the deep it’s from my heart.
Seller 2: Then just give your heart to her.
Jordan: Alright well, thanks, bye bye.
Asking people for free things, is like I dunno, I felt like a bum asking those merchants for free things. Like ‘hey can I have something free for my girlfriend?’ It sounds, it makes me sound so cheap. Again, whose idea was this? It just makes me look stupid.
Jordan: I need to find something for her.
Organizer: I will introduce to you another very awesome seller.
Jordan: Okay, okay
Jordan: That’s cool.
Seller 3: Thanks.
Jordan: Yeah, I need to find something for my girlfriend.
Seller 3: What kind of color does she like?
Seller 3: Yeah. Does she like fluffy things?
Jordan: Pinks. Yes she likes fluffy things.
Um, she has one of these.
Seller: Yeah, these are for hair band. Rings are nice, too.
Jordan: Rings? Ummm
Seller 3: Necklaces?
Jordan: Umm she doesn’t wear much necklaces.
Seller 3: Or felt? These are made by, handmade.
Jordan: You? You make them?
Seller 3: Some of them is mine and some is my students'. I teach people to do felt weaving.
Jordan: Oh, she likes this stuff. She drinks this, this is from Hong Kong?
Seller 3: Yeah, it’s Hong Kong lemon tea.
Jordan: Yeah, um how much is this?
Seller 3: It’s 100 kuai (RMB)
Jordan: Ugh, 100? Can I get it for free?
Seller 3: Na, Sorry, no.
Jordan: Alright then, Bye
Seller 3: Good bye!
Organizer: I'm sorry dude I have something to do now, so see you later.
Jordan: Oh, alright see you man, see you.
Jordan: Oh so because I’m American I want the M16?
My Mom would like that.
Seller 4: 150.
Jordan: OK, thanks.
Seller 5: This is from Korea.
Seller 5: And this is from Japan.
Jordan: Oh Korean and Japan?
Seller 5: And, this one from South Africa.
Jordan: South Africa?
Seller 5: Yes! Handmade, you can put your passport in it.
Jordan: That’s cool, South Africa. Oh, it smells like South Africa.
Seller 5: Yes, Yes.
Jordan: Oh it’s elephant skin?
Seller 5: No, it's coo.
Jordan: Ah? Coo? Coo? Coo, am I right?
Seller 5: Cow!
Jordan: Oh, okay sorry.
Oh, okay. How much?
Seller 5: 150. Only these two left.
Jordan: Oh, uhh yeah?
Seller 5: It's very special.
Jordan: Can I get it for free?
Seller 5: Hum?
Jordan: As a gift?
Seller 5: Oh, no sorry.
Bob Dylan, Cold Play, Neil Young, Yoko Uno probably the worst CD ever, but uh anyway I haven’t been able to find anything for my girlfriend for free so I’m going to talk to the organizers and see if they can help me out.
Alright, so JAO FEI (SPELLING) was a little bit busy, couldn't find him he’s running around like crazy. But I found these two things, maybe they can help me out and I can get a gift for Dinda, my girlfriend. Maybe.
What if it said vintage sex?
You want a vintage hug? It’s not like a modern hug.
There’s no body here.
Another time standing on the corner, unsuccessful, like a h*****
I’m a horrible h*****
I wonder if I said vintage b**** for 5 kuai if anyone would go for it.
You want a #$@$@
Oh, Intage, Hey where’s that marker?
After we bribed somebody to give me money, that’s when people started coming up and giving me hugs and money. And everyone was really cool. So I guess it changed my mind, at first I was just like this is just a stupid idea. Why do we have to do this. Then we started getting into it and I started having fun with it.